I tried to sleep through it, but I couldn’t. I don’t know how anyone did. It was like a hurricane in the midwest – I thought my windows were going to come in. Once the hail started, I gave up. I was just lying there watching the lightning anyway.
So, I got up, and came out and sat down by the big windows in the living room to watch the storm. I happen to love thunderstorms, so I’m not really complaining. But we’ve also had a ridiculous number in the past few weeks – makes up for the lack of good ones last year, but also makes them less exciting. If I would have just watched the storm, I could have been back to bed in 15 minutes. It calmed from a severe storm to a normal storm pretty quickly. But, I made the epic mistake. I grabbed my laptop.
Now, an hour and a half, two job applications, an entire inbox of e-mails, and all of the morning news stories later, the sun is finally beginning to rise. And now, if I go back to bed, I will undoubtedly be unable to get up again when my alarm should go off. So I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I am just up. And I might be useless by noon.
My blog has been neglected lately. As has everything else in my life. They warned me it would do this – that studying for the bar would actually make a person more of a recluse than law school did. I didn’t believe them. They obviously didn’t have my schedule of working and teaching and researching on top of classes in law school.
But the truth is, although I technically have more hours in my day, I have less brain power to enjoy them. Watching lectures sucks up endless amounts of time, and when I emerge from the study cocoon, I am a zombie of my former self. My brain is too melted for anything that requires effort or creativity. My hands are too exhausted from taking notes and writing notecards to paint or draw or even type. When I look at myself in a mirror in the late afternoon, usually still in my pajamas and somehow covered in ink, the most I can manage is a shower. Then, I put pajamas back on. Because there is no point in getting cute to watch 5 hours of someone telling you what you forgot about property law. Scratch that… I’m not sure I knew it to begin with.
Now that all of my normal procrastinations have been expended before 6 am, I have no excuse to not get back to work. The insanity is calling.