Conquering The Clutter: No Drawer Unturned!

I have this dream of having a perfectly organized home.  Not just normal person decently organized, but completely, ridiculously, systematically organized.  Before I scare you away, don’t worry… I’ve never come CLOSE to succeeding.  But doesn’t it just sound amazing?  I enjoy my home so much more when it’s clean and organized, but keeping it that way always proves a challenge.

The biggest obstacle: we have way too much stuff. This is me:

Well, at least that’s me trying to wrangle too much stuff into our small, poorly designed, storage areas. (Seriously, who designs a front hall closet in an acute triangle so that you can’t mount a bar to hang coats?)

But the truth is, I am too sentimental, my husband inherited his mom’s pack rat mentality, and we have both moved things from place to place, time and again, without ever taking the time to really stop and think “why am I packing this?”  Instead, it just gets dumped in a box.

I’ve said before that I just want time to go through everything, but I always make excuses for why I can’t.  EVERYTHING is a big project.  It’s too daunting to know where to begin.  But with a sudden dose of inspiration, one afternoon I opened the closet in our living room, and I just started.  I found hand warmers that expired in 2005.  I’ve moved them to four apartments since then.  I had to keep going… this needed to be done.

The hardest part has been convincing myself not to cheat.  No box goes unopened.  No “I’ll come back to this later.”  Just step by step, moving through the whole apartment.  No drawer unturned!

I moved on to my bathroom drawers.  Who knew they could accumulate so much junk? Abandoned half empty bottles, black lipstick from halloween two years ago… I’m pretty sure I had eyeshadow from before I knew how to properly apply eyeshadow.  It was time to get rid of it all.  The days of experimenting with random products has long passed. I use the same handful of products every day, and the rest were just clutter.

The bedroom closet came next.  That was a full day event.  Most of my clothes never even made it into the overstuffed closet, they just got plopped on the couch (never put a couch in your bedroom… it’s just asking to become a dump zone).  Turns out the dress I wore for my high school graduation had somehow made it through college, post college, and law school without being discovered in the back.  Sad, but true.  Two big bags were donated, three went straight into the dumpster.  But suddenly, our bedroom was spotless, organized, and a lot less chaotic.

In the linen closet I found extra long twin sheets from my freshman year of college, bedding for beds in sizes we don’t own anymore, and an accumulation of gifts from my mother in law, including a large pastel easter tablecloth with a bunny on it.  With my husband’s blessing, those got donated too.

The worst was definitely our guest room.  It’s really more of a half office/ half random dumping ground, with a bed in it.  And that is where most of my stuff had landed when I moved in.  Art supplies, office supplies, notebooks and journals half full of writing… I started considering just giving up.  I’d done a lot.  That was worth something, right?  But guilt kicked in, and I finally, begrudgingly, returned to work.

It turns out the hardest part was actually the most fun after I got started.  The boxes of memorabilia I had collected over the last 26 years made for a sweet stroll down memory lane once I got into it.  A lot if it had to go… I didn’t need that many random birthday cards saved.  But the one from my sweet sixteen with a note from my best friend that made me cry when I re-read it? That stayed. There was a lot of tickets and brochures, things I’d picked up traveling that never made it into a scrapbook, things from old boyfriends that don’t matter to me anymore.  But there were also some things I’d forgotten about; things I’d always meant to frame, journals from my teenage years, things I’ll want to show my kids someday.  Reducing the pile made it all that much more meaningful.

I had just finished this last room when I went to pick up Gretchen Rubin’s new book yesterday, Happier At Home.

Ironically, her first month?  Possessions.  A lot of what she said rang true with my own recent experience in clearing clutter and getting rid of the extra stuff that weighs us down. But she also had a piece of research that really struck me: the people who are most insistent that possessions don’t matter at all, only people do, are typically the most isolated and lonely.  And in a weird way, it makes sense.  The stuff that was hard to get rid of, the stuff I kept even though I don’t need it… it has meaning to me for a reason.  And it has nothing to do with the value of the item itself.  It’s the things that remind you of moments and people that are hard to part with.  And why not clutter your home of those… they’re what home is about.

Step one of the big organization product is finished… And it feels amazing.  I’d love to hear about your adventures in trying to clutter!

The Things That Stay With You

I’m partial to the smell of air at night.  I know, that sounds weird, but there’s something about how the air cools and yet the scent of the day lingers in it, almost heightening it.  Last night as I left a competition practice, there was a scent in the air that made me nostalgic.  It caught me totally of guard.  Something about the scent of spring blooming, which when I was little, meant a sad end to my favorite season of the year.

I quit figure skating when I graduated high school.  I was too old to go much farther competitively and I didn’t have the time.  It’s not a sport that favors those growing older.  And even when I put my skates on randomly after that, it didn’t feel the same.  The grace and ease that comes with practicing five days a week was gone.  The familiarity and comfort wasn’t there the way it used to be.  The ice was where I lost myself at one point in time, where I went with my emotion and frustration and let it all out.  I’ve been missing that same outlet lately.

When I think about skating for myself, and leaving all of my emotion out on the ice, I think about this performance.  It wasn’t in competition.  It wasn’t the best choreographed routine ever or the most perfect performance.  It was skating from the heart.  I pulled it up this morning, and ten years later it still stirred in my soul.

 

There are a lot of things in my life I never could have imagined ten years ago.  My life without skating… I couldn’t have imagined it them.  My life without certain people in it?  Never.  Except they’re not anymore.  I had a lot to learn.  The path I’m on isn’t the path I imagined back then.

But maybe, there are thing I can learn from the person I was too.  She was confident and independent and ridiculously creative.  She had so many dreams she didn’t know which to pursue first.  She sought to prove everyone wrong.  She made no apologizes for who she was or what she believed.  She was stronger than I am now.  More reckless.  More fearless.  And she put her whole heart into everything, never holding back.  And she knew how to let it all out.  She knew what she wanted.

Maybe her inspirations still have some inspiration for me.

Sentimental

I am incredibly sentimental.  I hate the fact that you can’t get back the things in life that make you smile when you remember them.  I always want change, but then before it can happens, I want life to hold still because I’m not ready.  Time passes, and sometimes it simply breaks my heart that I’m powerless to stop it.

When I was a little girl, they used to play The Bodyguard every year on TV.  And I remember, year after year, curling up on the couch with my mom watching it.  I loved it.  I loved the music and the romance and most of all, I loved having something that I always did with my mom.  I’m not even sure if she’d remember.  But there was a time in my life when I felt like I didn’t have much in common with her… we had such different personalities and interests.  But once in a while, we’d click.

We used to go on shopping trips, and on our drive we’d put on a CD, often someone like Whitney with a powerhouse voice, and we’d sing at the top of our lungs with the music so loud that you couldn’t hear anything.  I loved it.  I still do.

Tonight’s news of Whitney’s passing brings out the sentimental side in me.  When I hear of anyone taken so suddenly, I’m sad for their family and friends.  But tonight, I’m also sad for those of us who just loved her voice.  For all of us who pretended we could hit that note in “I Will Always Love You” while driving in our cars or shampooing our hair.  For everyone who’s ever sang into a hair brush.  The greats help us dream, and when I was a little girl, her voice helped me dream big.

And yet, while I’m sad, I’m also smiling.  Because sometimes we need reminders of the things we once loved and the things that shaped us.  The things that made our lives full.  The things we don’t take the time to think about.  Memories are powerful. And I am lucky to have so many fabulous ones.