Monthly Archives: June 2012

Monday morning is particularly bittersweet this week.

Posted in Family, Friendship, Life Ramblings, Relationships by

This weekend we celebrated with family friends as the youngest of us kids graduated from high school… The baby isn’t a baby anymore.  Nope, he’s now taller than me, plays in a band, and never walks around in a firefighter’s hat anymore, though  my sister and I both swear he had one on his head for most of his childhood.

Graduations used to be our benchmark.  There was one every other year, guaranteeing a good party to mark the passage of time for the last decade.  Now we talk about engagements and weddings and when we’ll all bring babies into the mix.  Obviously the transition has been gradual, but it still feels sudden.  All of the childhood memories of summer nights by a fire now seem just out of reach.

I was given a quilt by a friend of my parents when I graduated from high school many moons ago.  She chose fabrics with patterns that look like they could have made old childhood clothes, playful and fun.  At the time it was given to me I thought it was an odd gift… she was not someone that I was particularly close to.  I didn’t even know she made quilts.  But after my Sophomore year of college, when my apartment building had a massive flood and we had to evacuate, it was the first thing I grabbed.  And yesterday, as I was cuddled on my bed after everyone had left and the apartment was quiet, it was what I pulled over me.

In some ways I’m sad that we’re all grown up now, but mostly, I just feel blessed.  It’s easy to forget all of the people and places that made us who we are, but as we sat around flipping through old photo albums this weekend, it was nice to remember.  I think the older I get, the more I love that quilt, because I realize I am the product of a fabulous collection of memories.  Some of the people in those memories I never see anymore, but they still shaped me, while they were around.

I know we could end up anywhere after this.  We have no idea where we’re going to raise a family.  We don’t even know where we’ll live when the summer ends.  Mostly I just hope we find a place with as many fabulous people as where I grew up.  I want my kids to have people to look back with like we did this weekend, to retell stories with, and to laugh with.

Monday morning is particularly bittersweet this week.

A Smattering of Random Thoughts

Posted in Life Ramblings, Marriage, Relationships by

There are certain things in my life that are constant, and that I depend on being that way for the day to day operations of life to go smoothly.  Apparently, that was asking too much this week.  It was one thing after another went absolutely off the rails and crash landed right in front of me without any forewarning.  It was a mess.

So now, as I sit here wrapped in a big cozy blanket my best friend made for me when I went away to college, eating Frosted Flakes out of the box, I’m realizing the worst part of my week is this… because I don’t have any idea what I was supposed to learn from it all.  Sometimes everything goes wrong and you know… you need to take a break, you need to give up control, you need to get off your butt and fix something.  But right now, nothing.

So here’s a smattering of random thoughts for you, because I am clearly unable to put a cohesive post together this week:

1. You know those things that you thought you were going to fight about in marriage, back when you were sitting in your pre-marital counseling or talking to your girlfriends at a shower, or maybe even just daydreaming about when you hadn’t met the right guy yet?  Yeah, nope.  It’s the stupid things that you never see coming.  And you don’t see them coming because they don’t matter at all.  But sometimes one of you is having a fabulous day, and the other one isn’t and suddenly, BAM.  Out of nowhere.  And you know what you learn from that?  Marriage is hard because you’re both human.  Marrying a celebrity in your head, or cuddling with your Teddy Bear… always easier. And there’s really nothing that fixes human.  So you just had to move on.

2. I used to live off of cereal in college.  There were plenty of days that Frosted Flakes out of the box were dinner… Now I always expect dinner to be an actual meal.  Now, most of you probably won’t agree, but I kind of miss college dinners.  I’m sorry, I know that’s completely un-adult urban-foodie of me. My husband’s friends would die if they read this blog.  But come on… It was fabulous junk and very little with nutrients, and somehow I was far smaller and never got sick.  How was that possible?  If I ate like that now I wouldn’t fit through doorways and I would be constantly ill.  I miss that.  I also miss being able to stay up all night, get two hours of sleep, and look fine the next morning.  And function.  What happened to that?  I’m too young to feel this old.

3. I miss Gilmore Girls being on TV.  I really do.  I own them all.  I watch them when there’s nothing good on.   And I’m just saying… I miss that.  Witty, well written, made me care… I miss Friends too, now that it’s finally not on every channel every day in syndication.  And Home Improvement.  Whatever happened to sitcoms that weren’t so over the top that no one’s family operates like that?  Or maybe they do, and mine just didn’t.  Either way. I miss good TV.  I miss well written dramas, like West Wing.  I miss shows where the characters became your friends, like Sex and The City. I’m kinda disappointed Hollywood.  Do better.

4. I don’t understand tourists in the Mall of America.  I realize that my home mall, three minutes from my house, is a vacation spot for people.  I normally avoid it on the weekends and back-to-school/Christmas times.  But it’s kinda fabulous to live next to on a random Tuesday afternoon.  It’s empty and has everything.  So aside from invading my mall, which I know I need to accept, can you answer me this?  Why, oh why, do you need to take a picture of your kid every 5 steps.  Take one by the giant Dora The Explorer or Sponge Bob in Nickelodeon Universe (which should still be Camp Snoopy) or take one by the giant lego guys outside the Lego store.  But really, it’s a mall.  You have a Gap where you came from.  I’m sure of it.

5. I need coffee. And not just coffee.  Over the top coffee.  I need to go to Starbucks and order something with 8 directions and then savor it and forget about how my apartment isn’t clean and we have family coming, and the laundry isn’t done, and I have BarBri to do… Oh, and I still haven’t gotten a Mother’s Day gift. And now it’s almost Father’s Day.  Couldn’t we have spread those out a little more?

Ok.  Time to get back to work.